If you have listened to any motivational speaker, ever, there are many common threads and themes that they all champion, the number one thought is “the power of positive thinking”. Its all about what’s happening in your head. The dialogue you’re having with yourself, about yourself. Have you stopped to listen to it? Is it positive or negative? What are the words you’re using on yourself? Would you use those same words on someone you love? Sadly, it does happen, but most often, we’d never say those words to our co-workers, friends or extended family, but its the words we’d use in our heads on ourselves.
When you decide to stop abusing yourself and start loving yourself, or even just liking yourself, or as a minimum, tolerate yourself, you have to start with the dialogue in your head. Each time you catch yourself being mean to yourself, or about yourself, you need to apologise, retract and rephrase. You can’t expect yourself to do better when all you do is belittle yourself.
You’re worth it. Your future self is worth it.
How can you expect anyone to think you’re awesome and amazing if you don’t think so about yourself to start with. It’s not about vanity, it’s about confidence. Fake it until you make can only help for a certain length of time, and then if you don’t start believing it you’re never going to. Not many falsehoods can endure forever.
Life’s way too short and precious to be beating yourself up on a constant basis.
Try a little tenderness – try to find just one thing to like about yourself, whether it’s a character trait or physical trait. How about if you are in a non-loving relationship with your body, but you’re punctual, neat, considerate – start by acknowledging that. Start with one thing, then each day, look for another thing to love about yourself.
It’s not about vanity, it’s about self love and acceptance, and when you love and accept yourself, your inner dialogue changes from a war zone to peace. So raise that white flag today and ‘try a little tenderness’ with yourself.
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